Finding Life
by AiYukiChan
Summary: Fem!Ed. Edward loses her right arm instead of her left leg and the truth wouldn’t let get Al’s soul back to attach to the suit of armour – so she has to find a reason to live when people won’t let her kill herself. Roy/Ed


Disclaimer: Alrighty, here's the deal, I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist; anything you recognize most probably came from the wonderful creator Hiromu Arakawa or other fanfiction writers that I've thought I needed to put in here to get the story running smoothly (unless of course they borrowed it from me) oh well, ta ta for now.

AN: Hello peoples, here I am with a brand new fanfiction, this one FMA and like In Spite of Betrayal (referred to in the future as ISoB) its AU and the main character is female instead of male like the original Artist/Author intended. In this the Rockbell's live in central, Edward loses her right arm instead of her left leg and the truth wouldn't let get Al's soul back to attach to the suit of armour – so she has to find a reason to live when people won't let her kill herself.

Prologue.

"You know, you don't really need me here to investigate one letter addressed to Hoeinheim Elric." A moderately tall man with black hair, gold-green eyes and glasses dressed in a military uniform told his best friend of several years.

"Nonsense, you're the best in research. I may need you here." Replied a slightly shorter man also with black hair and in a military uniform, he however had eyes so dark it was difficult to tell just what colour they were.

"You just didn't want to travel to this dusty country town by yourself Roy – though at the moment it looks like its drowning."

"Really Maes, you think so little of me to suggest I would take you away from your no doubt important work so I didn't travel alone."

"Yes." Roy faulted at that, then started concentrating on the matter at hand.

"Something smells foul." He told his partner.

"How can you smell anything over this rain?" Maes questioned incredulously.

"That's not what I meant. It's on an alchemic level – something doesn't feel right."

"Alchemy's your area of expertise – however as a researcher, I suggest we start with that unearthly glow we saw earlier."

"Yeah, that was alchemy – but it felt... wrong somehow. Let's go."

"You're the boss."

The ground was soft and muddy and their boots squelched every time they took a step, as they got closer to the small house the feeling of 'something wasn't right' got worse.

Even Maes, who had no alchemic ability was feeling increasingly ill at ease the closer they got.

Opening the unlocked front door and stepping into the unlit main area comprising of the kitchen, dining room and fireplace, switching on the light so they could examine their surroundings closer – they discovered the room had a homey blue and beige colour scheme and a hall leading to the more personal rooms of the house.

On the mantelpiece of the fireplace were three photographs – the first of an attractive family of four, a blonde man they confirmed to be Hoeinheim Elric, a beautiful brunette with green eyes they presumed to be his wife who was holding their younger child, a toddler with dirty blonde hair and grey-green eyes – The elder child had golden blonde hair and even brighter eyes of the same colour was in her father's arms.

In the second and third photo Hoeinheim was missing, in the second the children's mother had her arms around them – the third however only had the children showing off their catch, no – something was wrong here.

Not finding anything else of importance in that area of the house, the friends decided to explore further – the first door on the left was a bathroom, the first on the right was the main bedroom. The second on both the left and right were the children's bedrooms and while all of this was interesting (the girl's room was covered with some of the most fascinating alchemy notes Roy had ever seen), it was the door at the end of the hall that was ultimately more useful to their investigation.

The study was a mess of books, manuscripts and notes and had a door that looked as though it led down to a basement level of sorts.

Maes rifled through the mess "I've never seen anything like this before" he handed the notes he had just been investigating to Roy "its alchemy right? I can't make heads or tails of it."

Roy took the notes and froze "Shit! This isn't just alchemy." He said shakily, "This is forbidden, it's Human Alchemy." He slumped against the wall "Let's check the basement; this is probably what we saw earlier and the basement is the only place in the house that's suitable for a transmutation this big – dammit, a day earlier and we could have stopped this!"

He opened the door carefully, then paused "Do you hear that?" Maes nodded, being in the military, they knew the sound of someone in pain – it was hard not to after Ishbal; the soft sound of sobbing was coming up from the floor below.

"Let's go." Maes whispered, Roy nodded his assent.

The first thing seen by them as they reached the bottom of the stairs was extremely difficult to miss – the massive array was unbelievably complex and precise, 'It's a work of genius – but being Human Alchemy; it was destined to fail from the beginning.'

In the centre of the array was – what was it? Whatever it was, it wasn't human.

The sobbing brought both men out of their horrified contemplation and reminded them what brought them down there in the first place, sitting huddled in the corner of the room in the foetal position with her left hand on her right shoulder trying to stop the bleeding and the pain, empty golden eyes took in the disaster around her as if she couldn't look away from it.

Seeing this, Maes instantly took control of the situation, taking off his great coat and using it to stem the flow of the bleeding – at this the girl tried to pull away.

"Hey there now, settle down kiddo – we're gonna help you okay; can you tell us your name?" The child stayed silent and was staring at the failed result of her efforts.

"Roy we've got to do something to stop the bleeding now – she's already lost to much blood."

"Bring her over here, I'll cauterise it – it'll be painful but it's our best option right now." Maes nodded and took her over so that she was sitting on the workbench.

"Okay kiddo – this is gonna hurt but it'll stop the bleeding, alright?"

The girl looked up at him for the first time "Just let me die." Both of the men looked up at her shocked.

"No." Roy answered – speaking to the girl for the first time. "Keep her still Maes."

"No!" she screamed "I couldn't bring Mama back and I killed my little brother – what do I have to live for now that they're gone!"

"I thought the equivalence was off – it rebounded but you only lost your arm – grown men with years more experience have died attempting what you did tonight; it's a miracle you didn't both die."

"Roy!"

"No Maes – she already knows this but she has to hear it from someone else for it to make any impact on her." He turned his attention back to the girl. "Do you think your brother or mother would want you to die, honestly think about it kid; would they want you to die uselessly – or would they want you to get back on your and show the world just what only you can do? That transmutation circle is brilliant – the result of genius that's been focused in the wrong place. No one is irredeemable Ms Elric – everyone sometimes does things they wish they could take back and make different. Now – will you let me cauterise that or do I have to do it forcefully – I've let far too many people die these past years and I'm not going to do the same to you."

"You're reminding me of sensei, she makes it sound like I have a choice when she's not really giving me one as well."

"Of course you have a choice – I'm letting you decide whether or not to live or to die – if you chose to let me, it means you've decided you want to live; if you chose to fight it then everything I've said has been useless and you still want to die – so, which is it?"

She looked unsure "I chose... I... I chose to..." Then she looked up into Roy's eyes with renewed fire in her own. "I chose to live."

And with that, Roy pulled on his glove and snapped.


End file.
